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Wednesday, 10/24 --
Hi. John likes playing golf & pool by himself.
JC doesn’t like playing golf with people he doesn’t know. The second time JC played golf he played at Pebble Beach. He started to play too slow and he had to hurry up or get yelled at by the “Course Marshal.” While looking up to see if Marshal had one or two “L”s, I found that Pebble Beach is looking for a part-time Golf Marshal.
Job Description: Attend to the varied needs of the golfing guests. Ensure that play moves at a reasonable pace and diplomatically enforce rules and golf etiquette. Make sure course is set up for play and all guests are registered. Ensure safety procedures are followed in order to maintain a safe golf course to play. Extensive golf knowledge required. Valid California driver's license required. TO APPLY FOR THIS POSITION: Download and complete application and fax it to (831) 649-7618.
When you, the listener, look up SCGA in your favorite search engine, instead of getting the St. Louis Regional Chamber and Growth Association as the first entry; you get the Royal Canadian Golf Association.
Mr. Ed once played baseball.
“Juan Marichal is remembered for a notorious incident that occurred on August 22, 1965, in a game played against the Giants' arch-rival, the Los Angeles Dodgers. Batting against Sandy Koufax, Marichal felt that Dodger catcher Johnny Roseboro's return throws had flown too close to his head. Words were exchanged, and Roseboro, throwing off his catcher's helmet and mask, rose to continue the argument. Marichal responded by hitting Roseboro's unprotected head with his bat. The benches cleared into a 14-minute brawl, while Giants captain Willie Mays escorted the bleeding Roseboro (who would require 14 stitches) back to the clubhouse. Marichal was ejected, suspended for nine days and fined $1,750. Roseboro filed a lawsuit, but eventually settled out of court, supposedly for $7,000. Marichal and Roseboro would eventually go on to become close friends, reconciling any personal animosity and even autographing photographs of the brawl.
Many people protested the apparently light punishment meted out, but as it was it hurt the Giants considerably. They were in a neck-and-neck pennant race with the Dodgers and the race was decided with only two games to play. Marichal's nine-day suspension cost him two pitching turns, and the Giants lost the pennant by two games.”
We are rooting for Colorado because we don’t want the BoSox to win. But we are worried about the eight-day layoff. In 1946 the National League race came down to a three-game playoff; Red Sox management made one of the most monumental errors in team history. Figuring that an extended layoff could hurt their team, manager Joe Cronin and general manager Eddie Collins invited a team of American League All-Stars featuring the likes of Joe DiMaggio, Luke Appling, Cecil Travis, and Hank Greenberg to play the Red Sox in three exhibition games prior to the start of the World Series.
It proved to be both an economic and competitive farce as fewer than 2,000 fans attended any of the games and disaster hit the team in the fifth inning of Game 1. It was then that Washington Senators pitcher Mickey Haefner hit Ted Williams on the right elbow with an errant pitch. The team announced that while Williams' elbow wasn't fractured, he was receiving heat treatment and would sit out the rest of the exhibition series. And of course, who won that World Series? Your Saint Louis Cardinals!
Craig Kilborn had Bob Costas say, “Now that’s restaurant quality lemonade” in the NBA Finals. Conan O'Brien will have Joe Buck work the word "Jub-Jub" in during the World Series broadcast. Conan has been in love with the phrase “Jub-Jub” for awhile. He named Selma Bouvier (Terwilliger Hutz McClure Stu Simpson)’s pet iguana, “Jub-Jub,” on “The Simpsons.” Joe “The Human Puppet” Buck admits that he has “no work ethic or pride.”
I met my wife on a plane to London. Laurie met her husband while doing a play at the Black Rep. John met his wife at a Cardinals football game in the press box. JC met “Triple C” at the Taste of Soulard. We discussed Matchmakers and Gold-diggers.
The Corcoran family expands by one in less than 500,000 seconds. A new study shows people gain an average 24 lbs. after they get married. (Those two things have nothing to do with each other.) 96% of women are liars, honest. 19 outta 20 women admit lying to their partners or husbands, a survey on attitudes to truth and relationships has found. In the poll of 5,000 women for That’s Life! magazine, 45% said they told "little white lies" most days. 83% owned up to telling "big, life-changing lies", with 13% saying they did so frequently.
Top ten lies women tell:
10. "I love you."
9. "You’re wonderful in bed."
8. "You look ten years younger."
7. "The check’s in the mail."
6. "That dress looks good on you."
5. "I’ve only had one drink."
4. "I’ve got a headache."
3. "The bus/train was late."
2. "These shoes were only $25."
1. "Of course you don’t look fat!"
54 people have applied for patents to improve pizza boxes since the 1970s.
We had James Lipton from “Inside the Actor’s Studio” and author of Inside Inside on the air with us today. JC wants a boxed set featuring the musicians. Right now two box sets exist “Icons (Paul Newman/Robert Redford/Barbra Streisand/Clint Eastwood)” and “Leading Men (Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Sean Penn and Russell Crowe).”
I am including this here because I am sick of having it sent to me (but if you were one of the people who sent it to me – I’m not talking about you. You were the first.). According to “experts” if you see her spinning clockwise you think with your right brain & vise versa. (The intro to the video says the opposite, but the texts of the e-mails clarify that.)
Dave said bring in your plants NOW.
Reminders: Go see Laurie in I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change (now in its final weeks). JC is hosting the Our Lady of Lourdes Men’s Club Sports Trivia Challenge on Friday, November 16th. To get a table or to find out more call Dale at 314.863.2704.The JoY was the late Richard Jeni talking about fighting with your spouse. The Fab4 dealt with love (maybe someone is getting married?). The Vault was the “most romantic song that JC knows” - Nicolette Larson’s “French Waltz.” Finally, Aristotelis "Telly" Savalas (best known for playing Kojak – sucking on lollypops to quit smoking) is the godfather of Jennifer Aniston.
Don't
Do Anything Stupid,
Carl The Intern
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